The first Network Marketing Companies were founded over a century ago. So too were Pyramid Schemes (or Ponzi Schemes).

The former clearly drew lessons from the latter, adopting what was good and transforming it into the $ 250 billion dollar industry it is today.

In those early days, probably to gain some footing, many salespeople in Network Marketing resorted to hard-selling techniques – using psychological tricks and pressure to make a sale or recruit.

Obviously, this no longer works. People are educated and want to make informed choices. They don’t want to be manipulated or pushed into decisions that don’t align with their inner self.

I applaud this. Even in my early days, over 20 years ago, I hated those techniques. I do not do to others what I don’t want to be done to myself. Moreover, it is not necessary. I made great sales and recruited many amazing people into my network simply through sheer enthusiasm and sharing honest information. I don’t force-sell anything. I just do my job and let the sale be made by the one in charge: the client. I’m just the messenger, nothing more, nothing less.

To me, doing Network Marketing ethically is not difficult. When you start from a position of wanting to serve, you cannot go wrong.

It is always a hot topic for the starting Network Marketer when it is suggested that they contact their friends and family to get started.
It sounds strange to them because, obviously, we don’t want to put pressure on those close to us or make them feel obligated in any way to engage commercially with us.

I fully understand that – I went through that process myself.

Imagine you open your own art gallery with high class pieces for sale.

Who do you invite?

I guess possible professional connections, but surely some friends and family too, tight?

That does not mean, however, that you want or even expect any of those people in what is called your warm network to buy your artwork.

You just invite them because you love them, you are proud of the business you’re starting and you want them to be part of that – without any strings attached.

The same goes for setting up your business in Network Marketing – because that’s what it is – your self-employed business.

If I had to start setting up my business again now, I would contact someone in my network in the way that I’m used to contacting them, either by phone or via social media. I would behave the way I normally do by asking how their day was and how they’re doing generally. After that, I could say that perhaps this feels a bit awkward, but that I’ve started a new business I’m excited about and would like their opinion – either on the product or on the business opportunity. I would ask if they’re open to get together (possibly online) and have a talk about my new endeavor. I would probably even add that there’s no obligation, but that I need to learn how to present my business.

This way, usually nobody takes offense. In my personal circle, anyone has the right to ask me a question. If I don’t want to, I’ll say no. But when I know them, at least I’ll listen. The opposite has surely happened to me too! They’re not into it? That’s fine! I just move on to the next and don’t bother them with it again, nor do I take it personally.

We have a hard time saying no or hearing no; we don’t know how to react to that. You’ll learn that it’s just something to get used to. It’s not an offence – it’s just a message. It doesn’t mean anything about the way they personally feel about you as it shouldn’t change either how you feel about them.

Connecting with your warm circle in the beginning is not about sales, it is about learning – about your product, about your business, about answering questions, and about handling decline without getting defensive or shying away. A bit of humility, however, always serves in any given situation.

It is often said that Network Marketing is ‘Personal Development with a Compensation Plan.’ I still find that to be true every day I spend in this business of genuinely connecting with others.
(Read “My Big Why” here)

From this foundation it is quite easy to cross over to people you don’t already know. Most people find it even easier as, thanks to social media, you are allowed to stop any communication that doesn’t feel nourishing to you, and that is equally true for the other party.

Don’t go spamming, however. Just adding friends on Facebook and directly asking them if they are into your opportunity is not advisable. It’s intrusive and it gives a bad name to Network Marketing. It really shows you’re only into it for the money. Furthermore, you will have to contact so many people to get one decent prospect, and you will have wasted many other connections. There’s even a chance Facebook will ban you if they notice that – and they’re right.

Just add people you’re genuinely interested in. Take a look at their profile and honestly ask yourself if you feel you can have a decent conversation with them. See if there are genuine compliments you can give about some of the content they share. Assess if you share common interests.

This way you will build a complete network – not just a superficial spam based network of so-called friends you never talk to and who have no idea who you are.

The way to go is to shoot for the moon and to end up between the stars.

You don’t only want business prospects. You want mutually nourishing connections. Some will be just a friendly chat; others might become your partner in crime in some common interest, and yes, some of them might buy a product or become a successful member of your network. All of that is enriching for both parties – the reason for social networks to begin with.

Selling shouldn’t be weird. It should just be you talking enthusiastically about your new endeavour. The end result is simply not up to you, so let that go!

It serves to know that our whole society is based on sales. Everybody sells something. Even in a regular job, you sell your capacities and your time for a monthly wage. Besides that, we all buy stuff – on- and offline. How is this done? By goods presented in a store or in an advertisement. You need to figure out how to do the same thing.

Of course, you do need to engage – that is the point of Network Marketing. The enormous budgets spent on advertising on diverse media and physical stores by mainstream companies, in Network Marketing, are instead used for the one who makes the sale and creates a successful network.

You yourself are the marketeer. You represent the product. You represent the business. It gets really fun if you just let go (a bit) of the result and are in it for the process – if you learn to enjoy it because of the inner growth and the outer connections it brings.

It is all about building relationships. Imagine you’re at a bar and there’s a person you might be interested in. You decide to take your chances and go talk to that person. How would you start? Hopefully not by saying you want to get married and have six kids. Maybe just start with some light conversation to see if there’s a common vibe and a reason to dig a bit deeper. If not, it might become a friend or just a quick friendly encounter. Any of that is cool.

You do not need to chase, push or force – you’re not on a hunting ground and other people are not your innocent prey ready to be killed and eaten.

This sounds harsh, but some people go about it that way. They aim for people they think they can manipulate, get some quick gain, and then leave them without any care. That is not the way in this day and age. We are all human, we all deserve respect and we are morally asked to respect another.

The great possibilities of Network Marketing – and they are indeed great! – make people think they should hurry to get quick results.

With 20 years of experience, however, I see those who truly succeed and get 5- or 6-figure monthly incomes – all had to take their time, often thought of quitting and had to rise again after having fallen deep a few times before they got it right.

If you’re a sprinter – great! But realize sprinters take a rest after their run.

Network Marketing is an amazing tool, when you work with a trustworthy company you love, to create something long-lasting and worthwhile – but it is not quick, and continuous large amounts come only after you demonstrate commitment for the long run, evolve as a person and you develop your skills.

In my humble opinion, the same goes for any worthy endeavour.

To your success,

Dietrich Sven Corthouts
Elegant Network Marketing